To Live Fully

I was getting ready to post the thankful series again this week. My mind was wandering. I was having a hard time focusing. Then I opened my email and there it was. This email from Benjamin Ochenjele. Ben is the Head of Administration of the Faith Alive Foundation. Ben is also a Pastor at a church that is close to the Faith Alive Hospital and leads prayer gatherings that are held at the hospital for patients and staff. All of us on the missionary team I traveled with respectfully and affectionately referred to him as Pastor Ben. Pastor Ben is one of the people I met at Faith Alive that had a great impact on me.

I was wondering why I had not heard from my friend. Then I read this and my heart broke.



Dear All,
It is indeed amazing for the long period of silence. It was never my intention but due to some stuff I never had control over. I have been away for ZAMBIA, East Africa since April for a peace courses with Africa Peace Institute. My initial thought and plan was to communicate from there but to my disappointment there was internet break down in the Institute. I could not afford the exorbitant cost of getting it done at cafe in the city far off. So I was off communication with ALL till my returning couple weeks ago. As soon as I returned Doris my wife went into labor for our 3rd child which came up successfully but after three days the child took ill and was diagnosed with acute jaundice. We were admitted in University of Jos Teaching Hospital (JUTH). With every effort, up and downs, prayers and spending for us to have the child, but as God would have it the child passed unto glory in the morning of Sunday 18th. We could not found it easy at all for the child was very attractive and won the love of all who saw him both at the hospital and at home. More also, my wife went through much pains during his pregnancy.
The experience was a proof of the Bible as recorded in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
We only had him for just a week. God who gave became more interested in him and called him back home expertly after a week of birth. I named him "GODSWAY" and God indeed did it in his way. His way is not our way and its unquestionable. Glory be to Him who knows and have the best. Pray for my wife to recover.
We have learnt to accept it ALL since God permitted it because His way is always perfect.
Today is my official day in the office after a very long time of trauma.

Benjamin O. OchenjeleHead of Administration
Faith Alive Foundation

The scripture that Pastor Ben references has always been a favorite of mine. The verses were used as lyrics for a song in the 60's. "For everything there is a season,a time for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die...A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance..." 


Yes.

Your will not ours. Somehow bad into good.... Somehow.... 

Acceptance of this. We must accept this....It will be good. It will be..... 

You will make it BEAUTIFUL! You will....We believe.....

There will be a day. There will be a day....There will be a day when everything is beautiful.... 

When we will all be together again. We will....And there will be NO pain....only JOY.... 

Until then Lord let us do your will....your will....your will for us....

To love one another....to LOVE...to BE LOVING to everyone....

The lost, the sick, the lonely....the least of these....the least of these....

Are we not all this?....Have we not been lost, sick, lonely, the least of these....Have we not? 

Help us to stop judging....STOP judging and have mercy....Oh to have mercy and..... 

Break our hearts Lord for what breaks Yours....for what breaks Yours...Oh for what breaks Yours! 

Open our eyes Lord to what You want us to see....and remind us to look up....to look up..... 

You are a loving God just waiting....just waiting....for us to trust You...to trust....

So we can live .... so we can live....

TO LIVE FULLY.... the ABUNDANT life You offer!





(#31)Thank you God for Pastor Ben and all he does for the Faith Alive Community. (#32)Thank you for the inspiration he has provided me and all the other missionaries who have served at Faith Alive. (#33)Thank you for giving him the strength to be a husband and father, to persevere through trials and accept your will while also serving others as a gifted Pastor.






Praise to You Oh Lord, Oh Wonderful Savior!






Please join us in prayer for Pastor Ben, his wife and children at this time.

Photo: Pastor Ben, his wife and child (August 2009).

You Are A Wonderful God

I have been talking to you since I was a little girl.

So many sweet memories of giving you my world.

You are wonderful.

A friend to the weary.

You have been so faithful.

Your goodness it follows me.

You are beautiful.

Your love is never ending.

All these years we've been walking...

My Savior, My friend...

You Are Wonderful by Sara Groves

III

God never fails. We are told you will believe it when you see it. But living by faith is knowing it is the other way around. You see it when you believe it.

Last week I named gifts of ugly to beautiful that God gave me. Some gifts from God that should have been included that I am sure our friends in Nigeria would certainly agree with me on are the gifts of the Anawim Home -The Poorest of the Poor Orphanage, the gift of the Faith Alive Hospital, and the gift of St Pius X School for Boys. These places were built from nothing and in places where some might say it could not be done. But that is not how people of faith saw it. They believed. The ugliness of poverty, disease, hunger, homelessness and hopelessness became the beautiful gift from God of places that provided healing, food, shelter, education, hope and love. The stories of how these places came to be are wonderful and inspirational. They are similar to Mother Teresa's story. You can read about them in detail on our website. (#15) Thank you God for these great gifts. (#16) Thank you for the courageous faithful followers of Jesus who helped these places become a reality. (#17) Thank you God also for the faithful followers of Jesus who prayed for these places and those people.

Thank you wonderful God, my Savior, my Friend.

The gifts to give thanks for this week are gifts of smell:

(#18) Thank you God for the gift of smell. There is such an abundance of good smells to be thankful for that it is hard to chose. I will chose summer smells since I am enjoying some of them right now. Summer is my favorite season. It is when my family and I get to spend the most quality time together. School is over and there is that special freedom of no homework, the pool opens, vacations happen, etc.

(#19) flowers in gardens or hand picked bouquets

(#20) chlorine pool water

(#21) sunscreen lotion

(#21) food cooking on outside grills

(#22) the ocean breeze

(#23) babies necks

(#24) cotton candy

(#25) Christopher's deodorant

(#26) Sophia's scented sprays

The sweet perfume of flowers blooming everywhere is so wonderful! The best flowers to put on the table are hand picked bouquets straight from the garden or bought at the market if you can not grow your own. My favorite summer flowers are the blueish purple hydrangeas, peonies and zinnias.

I love the smell of chlorine water at our community pool. I watch the children splashing around and playing in the pool every summer. This brings me joy. My children are teenagers now. They are too cool for the pool! They spend their time now, if they go to the pool on the chairs suntanning! (#27) Thank you God that we are able to belong to a community pool.

Which brings to mind the smell of sunscreen lotion. This is an ultimate summer smell. This says summer has arrived! Everyone is enjoying the gift of the warm rays of sun from God slathering on the lotion to make sure they do not get sunburned. (#28) Thank you God for allowing us to enjoy relaxing days in the sun with our families that You provide for us.

Enjoying time outside with our families means grilling food outside. This produces a fabulous sensational scent. There is just something about dining alfresco. Food not only smells better - it tastes better. Our family loves to roast marshmallows by the heat of the grill when we are done dinner. When daylight turns to dusk and we turn to candles it is so special. Here it is again - it is in the simple moments - the simple moments are what we relish in life.

Another glorious scent we get to partake of in the summer is that of the ocean breeze. (#29) Thank you God for our many blessed beach family vacations. As soon as our car nears the beach town we enjoy I can smell it...that ocean breeze fragrance. It announces the beginning of our vacation. We have been going to the same beach since our children were babies. I remember the smells of my children at the beach when they were babies. They would nap under the beach umbrella. Then when they would awaken, the smell of their necks was so sweet as I kissed them and held them tight. Then soon they were toddlers and I remember the smell of sticky cotton candy that they loved so much but seemed to have more all over their face and hands somehow than ever got into their mouths! Now....now the smells of them in our house this summer.... My son, Christopher has this male scented deodorant (actually advertised as fresh scent) that is permeating the air. My daughter Sophia, has many scented body sprays that she chooses from daily. Today's choice is some fruity blend. Our house is quite "perfumed." I am sure we will bring home new and interesting memories of smells from our vacation at the beach this summer with our teenage children!

Thank you God for all the smells of summer. Thank you God for all the blessings you continue to pour upon our lives like belonging to a community pool and going on a vacation to the beach. There are those in this world who do not get to do this. We must remember this always.

Thank you wonderful God, my Savior, my friend.

As I write this post, I think of the people in Nigeria who do not have much and those who have much devastation. The people there certainly do not have the material things I write about in this post. I started this thankful journey in honor of the Nigerian people I met. Their strong faith and perspective of seeing what was important in their lives and being thankful to God despite their many hardships was so inspirational to me. I feel that if I never mention any material gifts in my posts at all I would not be authentic. I thought of never mentioning anything that did not refer to nature or people but I decided against it. This is my life. The people in Nigeria know the life we live here in America. They told us they love America. They were so grateful for every little thing that was done for them. They are not bitter. They know that none of us are perfect and that wealth in itself is not success. They just "get it." That is all I will say for now. I remember always crying as I was writing stories about them in my journal! I did not know what I was doing, but they loved me anyway... this strange middle aged woman who cried a lot, kept losing her stuff, got sick and seemed to always be praying. They were very kind. They wanted to know about my life and all of the missionaries lives and asked us to share stories and show them pictures of our families. They would love to hear from you too.

TO YOU MY FRIENDS IN NIGERIA:

My thoughts are with you this summer. Dr. Chris, Mercy, Sr. Oresoa, all the sisters and the children of the Poorest of the Poor, Pastor Ben, Pastor Esther, Blessing, Amos, Daniel, Little Chris, Rhoda, all the hospital staff, counselors, sewing school women at Faith Alive Community, and Fr. Abell ....How are you? Please take care of yourselves. We at HFWAF are praying for you. I am so grateful to God for meeting and getting to know YOU. (#30) Thank you God for this miracle. This is the truth - you are the most loving, accepting group of people I have ever met. I have made another new commitment in my life in honor of all of you. I will share it in my next post.

I am grateful to you wonderful God, my Savior, my friend.

Think of at least three gifts of smell that you are thankful for in the upcoming week. If you would like to, share with us in the comments section below.

Singing songs of praises to you God for the scented gifts of summer...and for all of your endless gifts...

You Are Wonderful!

From Ugly to Beautiful

Joy is the fruit of gratitude.

And gratitude is rooted in perspective.

And when one's rooted in Christ, one has been given the gift of the eyes that really see.

So joy is always possible.

As long as thanks to God is possible, then joy in God is always possible.

Joy is always possible.

Ann Voscamp ~ One Thousand Gifts



I hope everyone has had a good week. I have had a very interesting one after counting my blue blessings. The color blue has kept popping up all over the place. Have you ever had that happen? When you are meditating on something or maybe after hearing a sermon on a certain topic, the main subject seems to keep reoccurring somehow. I will hear about it on the radio, television, a friend will bring it up in conversation that did not hear it, or I will suddenly read about it. During the past week I have become more interested in Pinterest which is a a popular form of visual social media. I found that I kept coming across so many beautiful blue things that I started a whole board dedicated to the color blue. I enjoyed doing this since blue has always been my favorite color. I couldn't believe the absolutely gorgeous blue ocean and sky pictures I was coming across without searching for them. It is like they were exploding across the screen at me. I actually got teary! And how could it be a coincidence that then there it was.....a huge blue eye staring right at me! I will be honest when I got this prompt I thought; Oh this is a lightweight one. I did not know how this would work to come up with three things to be thankful for that are blue. The ocean and the sky thing - we can all think of that one. It just did not feel personal enough to me and yet I was very thankful. One of my true loves is the ocean. My children's blue eyes were more personal. But, I was wrong. God has His ways when you give it up to Him and really thank Him. Just like Ann says in her above statement "gratitude is rooted in perspective." When yours is rooted in Christ, God will give you the eyes to see.

I had gotten uncertain news about my health about three weeks ago. I had to have a test done last week. So, I started this thankful journey while I was waiting for the test results. If the test results were to come back positive, it would be serious. So, I waited and prayed. It helped to be doing this while I was waiting. Our blessings become magnified in times like this. It should not be this way. But it is for us humans. We need things like this to happen in our lives to knock some sense into us. I feel like God was talking to me. He was reminding me of the simple yet magnificent beauty that I had just stated in my blog post. There is so much joy, so much beauty that surrounds us every day.

I had another event to help take my mind off of the test last week. My Nativity Nigeria 2009 teammates organized a get together for dinner Friday night. We have not all been together as a group (just us) since we first got back from our Nigeria trip. I was SO grateful. It could not have come at a better time. We caught up with what is happening in each others lives. As it happened, there was a huge thunderstorm here Friday night. The power went out in our area. I had to call to make sure the restaurant we were going to was still open. The power was still on there so our plan was still set. Why this is all relevant is we traveled to Nigeria in August. The month of August is part of Nigeria's rainy season. So most of the time it is raining. Also, in Nigeria there is very little electricity. We couldn't believe we were having dinner together on this night. It was actually perfect. We called it our "Nigeria weather night!" We laughed, shared our stories, our love for Nigeria, the people, and the friends we made there. We all said how we would love to go back one day. We said we would not only love to go back but how much it would mean to us to go back together as a group again. We share a special bond.

(#4) Thank you God for these wonderful people who went to Nigeria and supported me while I was there. (#5) Thank you for them showing up in my life Friday night when I needed them. (#6) Thank you for these old friends who can share and remember those special memories with me of Nigeria and our dear friends in Nigeria. Three things not even on the list!

(#7) Let me not forget this - The test result came back negative yesterday. I am okay! Lord help to keep me thankful and may I always be rooted in You so that I have "eyes that really see."

Grateful to You Oh Lord for this.

This week's thankful prompt is what gifts have you been given in your life that have gone from ugly to beautiful? Have there been circumstances in your life that God has turned from bad to good? Sometimes we have such hard difficulties in our lives and while we are going through them we certainly find it hard to see any beauty in them. But later, we find a gift in the difficult circumstance in that it has somehow brought us good maybe even joy.


My three gifts from ugly to beauty that have happened in my life are:

1. Difficult Circumstance ~ Blessing

I had a "different" kind of family as I was growing up. I always felt different. Growing up in the 60's and 70's (yes, I am that old :) ) I often felt out of place with divorced parents. Each of my parents are actually divorced twice. I had a difficult childhood and teenage years. Without going into too much detail here, there was a lot of chaos in my life. I did not want anyone to know what was going on in my home so I did not have many friends. There were family broken relationships, friends of our family who did not stick around for the mess, my Mom got sick, my younger brother got sick....by the grace of God I did not. I needed to work to help my Mom out and somehow take care of myself and pay for my college education. I NEVER thought I would see the light at the end of this tunnel.

(#8) Thank you God for this "different family" because it made me who I am today. The circumstances were so hard. But because of this I know there is such a thing as God's grace. I received it. I love my family. My family and I have learned, grown and healed together. (#9) Thank you for the beauty - the gift of good that I became a stronger person by going through those struggles because I believe it has made me a more empathetic person. (#10) Thank you for the bigger heart I grew. It is why I love the broken hearted people of this world. I want to help people. I feel it is why I wanted to go to Nigeria. I was so determined to go there and I was not afraid. This was a huge blessing in my life.

Grateful to You Oh Lord for this.

2. My Will ~ God's Will

I could not have biological children. After being married I could not wait to get started on having children. I had a dream or you could say a plan of starting my own family. After trying to have a biological child for five years and after much tears and frustration I was worn out.

(#11) Thank you God for showing me that your plan is more beautiful than mine could ever be and to remember that relief comes with surrender of even our most precious dreams when they are not meant to be. (#12) Thank you for showing me how You are so faithful. My husband and I realized that we would love to adopt children who were in need of parents who were in an orphanage. We now have two beautiful wonderful children. Our son will be 15 in about 10 days and our daughter is 14 years old. God had a better plan in store for us then our own. His plan was more beautiful than we could have ever imagined. We would never trade our experiences of going to Russia to seeing them for the first time, bonding together with them there in the small apartment in the freezing cold temperatures. We will never forget the wonderful families who hosted us. We did not care that it was 40 degrees below zero! We were together at last! We were with each of our babies! In the end, we were with the babies we had dreamed of! It is true what they say...born of your heart. (#13) Thank you God for our amazing children and our unique unforgettable experiences.

Grateful to You Oh Lord for this.

3. My Sins ~ Fully Forgiven

Thank you God for the best gift of ugly to beautiful - the forgiveness of my sins. You make me new and beautiful from my ugly sinful self.

Grateful to You Oh Lord for this.

This week try to think of three gifts that you can thank God for in your life that has changed from ugly to beautiful. Please share with us in the comments section below.



...counting more of His endless gifts...thanks be to God.

Book Cover by Gin Gin Dionko

Thankful Wednesdays

Starting this Wednesday, I would like us to start participating in "Walk With Him Wednesdays" per writer and blogger Ann Voscamp. She wrote the best selling book One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are. It is a beautiful, inspirational book that I highly recommend. She also writes the blog A Holy Experience. In the blog she asks everyone to name 3 things that they are thankful for everyday or at least once a week. She suggests this is always best to do in the morning to start your day off. She posted in her blog, "When your heart's grateful to God at the start of the day, you can trust God in the hurtful of the day."Being grateful fills our hearts up like teacups so that they are not dry for the hard parts of the day which is bound to happen to all of us.

I thought the naming of the 3 things for which you are thankful, which she calls "Joy Dare", would be a nice exercise to share with the readers of this blog. People who have participated in this said it has been life changing. I have been posting how our Nigerian friends hold onto their hope and joy amidst difficulties. They are grateful for the small things. I think this is the key. I am so thankful for the simple, relaxing Memorial Day weekend I enjoyed with my family. On Memorial Day evening, we hung out together on our backyard patio, enjoying the summer weather and our favorite summer food of Maryland steamed crabs. We laughed together, the kids swinging on the tree rope, the dog playing with fallen tree branches and I just sat back taking in the moment. As I get older, I realize it's the small moments that mean so much and go by so quickly.

Each Wednesday, I will post Ann Voscamp's prompt for what we should say we are thankful for. Then you will respond by posting in comments. I hope everyone will join us in our thankful journey. I am asking our Nigerian friends to please participate with us. We would love to hear your voices because I believe we can learn so much from you.

This Wednesday's prompt is what 3 gifts of bluelare you thankful for? #1000gifts #JoyDare

Blue is my favorite color. Blue is peaceful and serene. In nature it is the color of so many glorious things. Here are mine: 1.) I am thankful for both of my children's amazing, beautiful blue eyes. Our son was adopted at six months old. As soon as we first saw him, we could not help but notice his eyes. They were round saucers and so inquisitive. He has deep blue eyes that we called ocean eyes. Our daughter, who we adopted at eleven months old, has pale, crystal blue eyes that were just as mesmerizing as soon as we looked upon her. Oh yes, my children's blue eyes...2.) I am thankful for the blues of summer vacation. The gorgeous blues of the ocean water are in my mind. The ocean is my favorite place to go and I am grateful to have a vacation with my family. I love and am thankful for everything about it even if these things aren't blue - the feel of the sun, the sand, the smell of the ocean, shells, beach houses, saltwater taffy, roaring waves, beach breezes, boardwalks... 3.) And finally, the blue that I am thankful for, one that I am enjoying this summer, one that has always been there, but sometimes I have taken for granted, is the wondrous blue endless sky, that God has given us.

Now it is your turn. You do not have to go into detail like me. Just list 3 things in the comments and use the hashtags above that are given after the question with your answer. Please share and give thanks to God.


Whom have I in heaven but you?
I desire you more than anything on earth.
My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak,
but God remains the strength of my heart;
he is mine forever.

Ps. 73:25-26

Eyes of Your Hearts

"May the eyes of your hearts be enlightened, that you may know what is the hope that belongs to his call, what are the riches of glory in his inheritance among the holy ones..." Eph 1:18

 I love this line of scripture in Paul's letter to the Ephesians. Paul speaks to the Ephesians about unifying belief and behavior when they are torn apart in this broken world of sin. He says to have faith we must look through the "eyes of our hearts." To accept what seems unacceptable and in time to forgive what is unforgivable we must pray for enlightenment that can only come from Him.

 Paul's words in the Message are this: "I ask - ask the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory - to make you intelligent and discerning in knowing him personally, your eyes focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is he is calling you to do, grasp the immensity of this glorious way of life he has for Christians, oh, the utter extravagance of his work in us who trust him - endless energy, boundless strength!" Wow! How beautiful. That pretty much sums it up. If we as Christians could "grasp the immensity of this glorious way of life" and basically just trust him what a difference it would make.

 I witnessed this faith lived out in the people at the Faith Alive and Anawim communities in Nigeria. As I departed on my first mission trip to Faith Alive, I planned to bring the Nigerian people a strong hope for the future. What actually happened was the Nigerian people instilled me with much hope from observing how they lived their lives.  I watched them rise very early in the morning every day happy to greet that day. They knew their purpose. They set about doing the work that they felt was God's work. At Faith Alive it was all about serving God and serving others. This was true at the Anawim Home too. There were people there to serve us - any missionaries that were there. One of the first things that was done everyday was to retrieve the clean water from the well. They had to take a truck down to the only working well and fill up big plastic garbage cans for each room of the guesthouse to have where most of us stayed. This has since been improved thanks to the Nativity Nigeria Advent Water Project. Three large hot meals were served to us everyday. They worked hard for the meals to be something that we would find appealing as Americans. I will never forget the cook whose name was Babba. He was an elderly man who had served as Faith Alive's cook since it started and also had been a cook since he was a young man. He was a sweet man always smiling asking if everything was okay. Most people there have malaria. One day he was sick with malaria symptoms. He did not stop working. He said having malaria is normal here. You just keep going. In between cooking and serving the meals for a few days he would lie down on the sofa. He did not make a fuss. Something about this touched me. I often make a fuss when I am sick. I can be quite noisy! When I am nauseous you know it! They made sure we were comfortable giving us all the bottled water we needed and offering us rides to the American style drug store for any medicines or snacks we needed. We were taken to church on Sundays by Goddy our faithful driver. They also offered to wash our clothes and towels. We declined this offer. They would have had to do this by hand. Electricity service was sporadic. They kept asking us if WE were all right! We were so humbled! They did all this while working at the hospital and taking care of so many sick patients. The important thing is that they did it joyously! Their belief and behavior were unified! They grasped the "glorious"life and they obviously had "boundless strength!"

There in this far off place from my home in the world, with no clean water and hardly any electricity (some living in mud huts) - extreme poverty that I could go on and on about here -  how can I explain to you how I felt so close to God? I did not see this place as God forsaken as some did. As I stated in my previous post, I did feel like my eyes had seen something holy. I saw so much more than can be explained in a few posts. I do not have any answers for why some people suffer more than others. But I do feel changed somehow for what I saw. It did feel like I was seeing things through the "eyes of my heart." Although my Nigerian friends lives were hard, most of them were very poor, sick and even HIV patients, they were able to grasp the "glorious" in their lives. It is amazing how even during times of great struggling and suffering, people of faith continue to survive, grow and even thrive. What I was able to witness were people living out their faith and defying darkness, being a beacon of light and source of hope not only for the visiting missionaries - but what I want to share here -  for all the world.


Top photo: Babba, the cook at Faith Alive guesthouse
Bottom photo: the sitting room at Faith Alive guesthouse

My Eyes Have Seen Holy

One part of our everyday schedule at Faith Alive was called "projects". This was the time you could serve in the area in which you were interested. As mentioned in the previous post, Dr. Chris had helped me realize I could be useful in the pastoral area of prayer and listening to patients' stories. I used to like spending this part of the day walking around trying to comfort people. There is a counseling unit that is part of Faith Alive's social services. The counselors inform patients how to prevent spreading diseases and how to cope with having a disease.

One day I met a counselor who touched my heart. She was a pretty woman wearing a beautiful African dress. She was sitting at the desk in her office and waved to me to come in. After noticing an article on her desk by Rick Warren, who wrote The Purpose Driven Life, I knew she was someone I wanted to speak with. "I am new" she told me. "You are new?" I asked. "Yes, I am new at this," she said. I emphasized "I am new new too! I have never been to Africa or any mission trip before." She told me she was nervous. I reassured her. I told her about our church and how most of us had read The Purpose Driven Life together. She said "I know my life has a purpose now." She then told me her story.

Her husband had contracted AIDS. She took care of him and her three children. It was very hard for her to watch her husband get sicker and sicker and eventually die. Somehow despite her best efforts, her youngest child caught the disease and died. She cried to God how can this be! She felt guilty and ashamed. She felt like she didn't want to live anymore. She told of how the Faith Alive Family helped her regain hope and how they showed her God's love.

She said she had always had religion in her life. Her family took her to church as a child. But something was different now. She now knew Jesus Christ as her personal Savior. All she wanted to do now was to share her faith and to help other people who are suffering like she had been herself. She said He did not mean for us to be alone. We have to go out, share our faith and try to help people.

I was amazed by her story. As I walked back to the guesthouse that afternoon, I thought of how the AIDS disease leaves women and children alone. There is still a very strong stigma in that country concerning AIDS. So most of the men who get the disease do not seek medical help. Then sometimes the wives get it and also the children who have weaker immune systems then also get the disease. They have nowhere to go. There are no shelters or clinics run by government agencies or non-profit organizations. There are no nearby wealthy neighborhoods for donations or handouts. There is only Faith Alive - an oasis in the desert - and Faith Alive depends on the mercy of other countries' donations. I wondered how would it feel to have to depend on the charity of another country for survival instead of it coming from a surrounding neighborhood, community, city or state.

As you walk down the street you see storefronts and houses that are little more than shacks. The Nigerian people wave to you, children run up to you. Everyone is saying, "You're welcome!" and "Thank you so much!" They are so grateful for the help they receive from America. I would have to just stop sometimes and catch my breath to keep from crying. They do not want pity. They need support and encouragement. They look up to our country. I think I was so blessed just to be born in the United States.

After a few days you know the path very well from Faith Alive to the guesthouse. As I looked down the street before entering the guesthouse, I saw some children playing in the street. I remembered when Fr.Emmanuel (born in Nigeria) celebrated the mass at our church and gave the Nativity Nigeria team a blessing a few days before we left on the mission. During his homily he asked, "When you see a dirty little boy playing in the street, will you be able to see Jesus Christ in that child, or will you only see a dirty little boy?"

Well, I saw Jesus Christ in the poor, Nigerian children playing in the streets. I saw Jesus Christ in the soulful eyes of poor and hungry children, in the patients with their bowed heads as we prayed together, in smiling and welcoming faces of the Nigerian people, in the caring, dedicated service of the staff and in the sacrifices that Dr. Chris makes for Faith Alive. I had such a strong feeling that my eyes were seeing Holy.

I played this song over and over on my CD player while I was there: My Eyes Have Seen Holy by Bebo Norman. Here are some of the lyrics and video:

...Mercy, weep over me.
Let your tears wash me clean.
Majesty, be merciful with me,
For my eyes have seen Holy.

Top photo: Some of the Faith Alive Social Services Staff
Bottom photo: The entrance to the Faith Alive Social Services Unit with the welcome banner for visiting missiionary teams.

A Mother's Day Prayer

It is Mother's Day on Sunday and this mother's heart is breaking for hurting children. I do not want candies and flowers this weekend. I want my Mom's Day prayer to be answered. I want all children's hearts to be healed. There are hungry, abandoned and stolen children in this world. There are spiritually wounded children right in our own community. Then there are the mothers hurting for their children. I have a special place in my heart for the broken-hearted, for the left out and lonely ones. I have been like this since I was a small child. I do not know why. I have found that it is part of my purpose here on earth. It is why I am drawn to missions ministry.

All of this rain we are having here in Baltimore this past week is reminding me of my trips to Nigeria. I went in August, which is the rainy season there. It would rain almost every afternoon. Dark clouds would roll in and the rain would come pouring down, making huge drumming sounds on the tin roofs of the buildings. It would be so loud that it was too hard to talk to each other. So everything was quiet except for the pounding, drumming of the rain.

On my first trip to Nigeria at Faith Alive Hospital, I did not know what I would be able to do to help out. I had felt called to serve and was very excited about going. I was so surprised that I was not scared to go and leave my family. However, when I arrived there I got nervous. The first night my team and I were sitting around together at the guest house having conversation and dinner with Dr. Chris, the Medical Director at Faith Alive. Everyone was discussing what they were going to do to serve at Faith Alive. My team consisted of a nurse, a lab technician, a few medical students and then there was me - a stay at home mom with no medical experience. There was also another missionary team at the guest house having dinner. Someone made an unkind remark about me that had something to do with "older" women not being much help. I thought: really, did anyone tell that to Mother Teresa? And when had I suddenly gotten so old? I laugh at this now, but it wasn't funny then because, after all, I was nervous and in Nigeria away from my family. Would you believe for the first time? Of course I chose Africa for my first time away from them! Anyway, the person continued to tell me what I couldn't do, to help explain their remark. I got upset. I let the negative remarks affect my focus. I thought what WAS I doing there? What could I offer at this hospital? When Dr. Chris was sitting by himself, I had a chance to speak with him alone. I told him I did not know how I could help. I do not remember the exact conversation, but he said something about everyone having a purpose for God's work and that everybody that comes to Faith Alive can use that purpose to serve. He asked me a few questions. Somehow he found out that I like to pray and that I believed in the power of prayer. That's great!" he said. I said, "It is?" Foolish me. He said, "It is one of the most important things. We need someone to pray for us confidently. You will pray for us. That is your purpose. Thank you for bringing Jesus Christ here." He got up after that. I remember just sitting there letting this sink in. Thank you for bringing Jesus Christ here. A simple sentence that said so much. Could I believe that? Can we believe that? Isn't that supposed to be what we do as missionaries - as disciples of Jesus Christ? Aren't we supposed to be the light? If we have accepted Jesus Christ into our lives and turn our lives to Him, then He will be manifested in us and we take Him wherever we go. How does it feel when you think about taking Jesus with you? That He is right there in you? Not just watching you from afar, but inside you. Instead of a detached, distant God, He is a close caring God, that we can become one with. Dr. Chris gave words of encouragement and love that day. You can choose your words to be a loving ,blessing balm to someone or a judging, condemning curse.

So now I had a purpose and was able to find my niche. I prayed for the patients at Faith Alive and I felt so humbled by it. The patients wanted prayers and they would hold my hands tight when I prayed. I will never forget it. I especially loved praying and spending time with the mothers and children that were in the sewing class at the Social services unit of Faith Alive. I was blessed by this experience. It might have never happened if someone had not encouraged me. Encouragement is God coming through you. It's His inspiration, beauty and love that will lift someone up.

Negative comments, of course, are not of God and produce negative feelings in others. I think we just all talk too much. I know people don't always mean to say hurtful things. But sometimes they do. Maybe it would be good if we could have the rain come down hard and have tin roofs like in Nigeria so it will be so loud we will be forced to have silence every afternoon. We should use that time to stop and pray.

Last August I went to the Willow Creek Leadership Summit where I heard a powerful, moving presentation given by Mamma Maggie Groban who started the Ministry for Stephen's Children in Egypt. This woman is a "mother" to many poor, forgotten children in her city much like our Sister Oresoa at the Anawim Home in Nigeria. This tiny, soft-spoken woman projected so much love and wisdom with her words. We were all amazed when she finished speaking. This is what she left us with:

I believe silence is the secret.
First, silence your body to listen to your words
Silence your tongue to listen to your thoughts.
Silence your thoughts to listen to your heart....beating.
Silence your heart to listen to your spirit.
Silence your spirit to listen to His Spirit.
In silence, you leave many, to be with the One.

Let's make time for some silence and prayer for mothers and children in Nigeria and here at home this Mother's Day. If you know a mother or a child who is hurting, please reach out to them. The least we can do is encourage, inspire, love and lift one another up.